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Happy Katanakka!

What is Katanakka, exactly? It's the day where the brave McNinja held their village against pirate invaders. Or not. It's probably some other day for most people. Welcomingsday? No, that's not it. Thanksgiving? That sounds a bit better, but not by much. Why would anyone give thanks?

(I sincerely hope you figured out that I was being facetious)

Any big news? Not really, except that Cecil's gone dark for a day. That's not really big. He usually talks to me every day though, whether by texts or phone call or Facebook comments. It's probably nothing. I'm probably just a bit paranoid on the bit of wine I've had today. 

Not really much to talk about now, as I am watching Star Trek: The Next Generation.  You don't talk while Patrick Stewart is talking. I MEAN IT. 

u wot m8? -Greg 

Get down with the Sickness!

I am sick! With something! I don't know what! But I am sick. It very well may be bronchitis. Woot! Coughing and insomnia! Also: Latin. There was Latin written on my last post, and I don't know who did that, but it was in the same font, and red. It pretty much said "Go to sleep, Dream, it will all be explained soon."

Yup. 


Well, that's exciting, if a bit odd. And no, I don't care about it. I'm gonna leave that alone. Because I know what happens in horror movies! I attempt to read into that bullshit and I get roped into a conspiracy. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and I am not going to be roped into any conspiracy bullshit! 

Enjoy- C

Drama+Other Stuff

Cecil here, bros and girls. I'm attempting to make this short and snappy, as I'm tired and listening to the Flaming Lips. Anyway, since Greg posted about it, I'm not gonna go into detail, yeah. Greg got suspended for beating the shit out of this douche who was being a prick to his ex-girlfriend. Stellar. 

I'm surpisingly tired. I duno why. I slpt enugh. And I've been getting migraines. Is this because of the Flaming Lips? Why do yoi hate amazin art-pop body? WHY?


Whatever. I'm going to district cimpetition for theatre. Woot! I have to get up at liek 9:30 tommorrow, but yeah. Should be good. goodnight evryone! - C






























Si autem somnium, vos comprehendant. Nulla. Nulla. Nulla. Quando evigilabo, et vere expergefactus, intelligitur quid scies. Quiescite ergo surge.

The Dane Chronicles: Chapter One (and possibly the final chapter I dunno yet)

I finally beat the flying fuck out of Dane. Am I proud of what I've done? A little bit. Never say that chivalry is dead. I defended a woman's honor. I AM A HERO. But I'm still suspended. 

How did it go down, you ask? More or less at a drama meeting in school there was minor bickering between Dane and Leslie, who are both in the club. I attempted to not intervene. It was up to the point that he called her a whore, and I snapped. I threw my arm around his shoulder and said "Dane, you and me are gonna go have a talk." And so I brought him outside, and the entire drama group followed. Dane stood in front of me and his body language essentially said "You gonna do something?" So I did. I swung and my fist connected with his jaw, and he slammed to the floor. I sorta blanked out after that, but Leslie told me that I wouldn't stop hitting him, and it took Johnathon (a linebacker, who also has a taste for the arts) to pull me off of him. Everyone essentially at first thought I had gone nuts, until Leslie told them what was going on, and then I was praised as a social-justice defender. Great. Just what I want to be remembered by. 

Anyway, I'm gonna be updating this blog, because I'm gonna be here for about a week. :D 
See ya guys. - Greg Shapely

The Dane Chronicles: Prologue

Since ol' C is letting me use his blog to vent on some stress, here goes.  (BTW, This is Greg. Blue font is me)

So, my female friend, let's call her Leslie, used to date this guy, let's call him Dane. 

So, Leslie used to date Dane. Dane is my second-best bro. (Cecil's my first) Leslie is also a very good friend.

So they dated for a while, and then broke up.  I don't know why they broke up, but Leslie said that she dumped him because he was slowly turning into a prick. I never really noticed. 

So fast-forward to like three days ago. I text Leslie out of boredom, and I ask her what's up and she tells me that she's crying. Apparently Dane has been texting her utter bullshit about her non-existent promiscuity, and when she told him about her depression, he said  (AND I FUCKING QUOTE) "I don't give a shit. I don't owe you anything."

I can't believe I was friends with such a piece of shit. I swear to god, I am going to beat the everloving FUCK out of this guy. Jesus fucking shit. 

I'm gonna title this the Dane Chronicles, because he's just been more and more dickly. Fuck. - Gregory Shapely 

News Time, Children!

I spoke with Greg today after Psych class, and he told me that he had nothing to do with the binary stuffs. So I guess someone's been playing an elaborate prank on me, trying to weird me out and stuffs. It ain't workin'! I am sufficiently non-weirded out! Anywho, I've been talking to Claire and she's doing better. Her parents still may be getting a divorce, but at least she doesn't hate me! :D That's a good thing. I am glad. 

So in other news, I have changed my password and I have given the new one out to only two other people. Greg and Claire. Hopefully that will keep other pricks from lootin' around in my blog. Why would anyone want to take over this blog anyway? It's literally crap. I just write about shit that's going on until I get carpal tunnel. Go and jack a different one! -.-

Anywho, I have a Christmas/Boxing Day concert coming up! (FUCK YOU, BOXING DAY IS TOO A REAL HOLIDAY) And what will I be playing on piano? Well, none other than SBURBAN JUNGLE! THE QUINTESSENTIAL CHRISTMAS SONG, OBVIOUSLY! It's mainly just to showcase our talents, as this is an arts school. So I'm gonna be teaming up with a marimba player, a drummer and a synthesizer player. That's gonna be fun.


Also, I've begun reading a new webcomic called "I Am ARG". (It's new to me!) It's the most intelligent dirty humor since "Clerks."
I sincerely hope you check it out.
Url? Just Google the damn thing you uncultured swine!

Until Next Time! - C


PURPLE FONT! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

not me dude.

Since Cecil's been bugging me, I'm Greg. I sorta-kinda-not really help Cecil out. He's an okay friend, but a bit paranoid sometimes. Anyway, he asked me to update some more on this blog, as I've never actually done that before. So yeah. I'm Greg. I am an amateur filmmaker from the same place Cecil's from. Jacksonville. I like airsoft. Yup. To continue, t'was not me who posted the binary. It could have literally been anyone, as Cecil hands out his info to anyone who asks, and to type in binary all you have to do is Google "binary translator" ain't that fuckin' hard.

To confirm Cecil, I haven't seen Claire at school either. We have two classes together, at the beginning and end of the blocks, so if she came in late, I'll usually have a chance to see her. But since Cecil's been kinda freaky in the past few days I think she's just taking some time off. I really do hope she's alright. 

But no. I didn't post the binary. So yeah. Find someone else to blame. (Seriously thanks for the access to your email and everything. You have like thirty-six notifications from Second-Life you need to get sorted out dude) - Gregory Shapely

Better! Kinda!

I am feeling much better. I kicked depression in its ass! WOOT! YEAH SWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG. Only now the issue is that Claire hasn't spoken a word to me in like forever. She hasn't returned my texts, my calls, and I haven't seen her at school. I seriously hope she's okay.

Also: I just killed Caesar in F:NV and Boone has the fucking coolest one-liner ever.

"Thumbs down you son of a bitch." - NCR Veteran Sniper Craig Boone

If you don't really know what that means, basically in Roman times (The faction in Fallout is called Caesar's Legion, and they emulate ancient Rome.), in the gladiatorial arena, when two gladiators went at it to fight, one would remain victorious over the other. If the loser survived, the winner would step on the loser's chest and force him to the ground. Then he would look to the Emperor of Rome, and the Emperor would stick his thumb out to the side and if he put it up, the loser would be spared, if he put it down, the loser would die. Boone's a badass.

Also when you confront Caesar after fucking the Legion over at every turn, he'll go on this entire monologue about how much you've fucked him over. Just read this.

Caesar: You're the courier who's caused so much trouble for my Legion, and yet you dare come before me. Vulpes Inculta, the best of my frumentarii, is dead. All the bribes I sent to the Omertas ended up buying me nothing. The Great Khans aren't exactly clamoring to fight for my Legion now. The garrison I established at Nelson has been wiped out. Years of meticulous scheming to place a mole at Camp McCarran - wasted. The Kings of Freeside are cooperating with the NCR now, which frees up soldiers to defend the dam. You even disrupted a promising weapons deal with the Van Graffs. So tell me this, because I really want to know: I am feared - with good reason - but you of all people dare to come before me, the mighty Caesar. What were you thinking?

Courier: Death to tyrants! <Start combat.>

 

I think I'll just post the most badass stuff from New Vegas here. (From TV Tropes.org if you want to see more)

 

• The Courier has lots more chances of being witnessed performing unusual deeds than in previous games, making him a bit more believable as a great hero. One particular moment comes from retrieving a fallen Ranger's corpse, which was being used by Fiends to ambush other rangers and NCR soldiers. Literally carrying his body back to an NCR position has you stating a few things about yourself, and the soldiers there responding in actual awe:

  Courier: I just did what anyone else would have done.

  NCR Soldier: Bullshit! Anyone else would have gotten killed!

  • Or a little more boastful:
    Courier: Now the Fiends and the NCR know not to fuck with me!
    NCR soldier: No fucking kidding!
  • Or one that while modest, is no less badass:
    Courier: I made a promise to Private Morales.
    NCR Soldier: That must be some code of honor you hold yourself to. Don't worry, no need for you to hoist him over your shoulder and haul him all the way back to California, like I know you would if you had to.
  • There's also dialogue if you retrieve the body at full health and return without taking a single point of damage.
    NCR Soldier: Oh my god. How the fuck did you do that!?!

 

 

Note: Also someone translated the binary, mainly because I was too damn lazy to do it myself. "just sleep, it'll begin soon".

Probably just Greg fuckin' with me. Whatever! See you guys! - C

Fallout New Vegas mods + Binary shit

Hey, it's Cecil. Still depressed and tired. I'm gonna keep this short. I got Fallout 3 and New Vegas for my PC and I'm having somewhat of a blast, just with intermittent spurts of hopelessness. I'm having decent fun, and it's much better than the console port version. 

Anyway, yeah apparently there was binary put there on my last blog post, and since about six other people have access to this account, I'm not doubting it was any of them. Probably trying to fuck with me or something, I dunno. Anyway, sorry about the short update, I'm really tired. - C

Depression is a cunt.

Yeah, obviously I am back. No I am not doing well, thanks for asking. Depression decided to say hey "fuck you and your happiness", but technically I wasn't really happy. The depression may have been brought on by the blackouts, or the fact that I'm not getting any goddamn fucking sleep at night anymore, and that's starting to scare me.

I don't know why I'm not getting any sleep, or why the blackouts are happening. If that wasn't enough, Claire's fucking crying every day, because her parents may be getting a divorce and she thinks it's her fault. I can't blame her though, that has to be a shitty burden to have to bear.

I wasn't really gonna update tonight, or this evening, or this morning or what ever the fuck time it is for you, but I did so yeah. I didn't die from my spout of sickness, but it seems that depression decided to come back. Fuckin' great - Cecil































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not cecil today!

hey, all you people who read cecil's blog! i'm claire, his girlfriend, and he's not feeling too well, and he asked me to update his blog, so here i am! he's doing a bit better, comparing it to last night. he just told me to write this in a different font, so now i am! anyway, he's feeling sick, it looks like bronchitis and so i told him to stay in bed and not to go to school. he's on antibiotics and he's slowly getting better, but until then, i will be updating this blog :3 - claire!

I write music

I do indeed write music. And I felt since I hadn't posted anything in a few days I might as well post some lyrics. Any feedback is appreciated.

Of Darkness and Ashes

by

Cecil Barnes

(Has sort of a soft piano feel going on)

Every time I breathe, everything turns to ash

Everything I see, it always fades to black

What I believe, it's always under attack

It's time to bleed, and see who will snap

(Heavy Guitar and Drums and Bass and shit, I dunno, it sounds cool in my head)

(Rapped)

It's SUB-lime

The smell in the air

It may be A-crime

But I don't even care

I'm FO-cused

on the gun in my hands

Maybe pull the trigger, then he'll understand

MUZZLE FLASH

it all turns red

SIRENS FLASH

I think he's dead

DECISION TIME

What have I done?

I drop the pistol, and break into a run

CORNERED

On top of a building

PUSH FORWARD

The gunshots ring

SACRIFICE

It's death or death

Either fucking way this is my last breath.

Every time I breathe, everything turns to ash

Everything I see, it always fades to black

What I believe, it's always under attack

It's time to bleed, and see who will snap

There's more, but I'm too lazy... URGH. Anyway, yeah. This is my music please don't steal it :C - Cecil

Emotions

I don't know why Eric's death hasn't affected me that much. It just hasn't. I haven't seen him in forever, and when I did he was really distant. Not really there. I think I had already coped with the loss of him. Metaphorically speaking of course.

Claire (my girlfriend) says I should also ask for help about this on my blog, even though I'm fine. It's a small thing, and I can get medicine for it anyway. But she says, so...

Since I was seven I've been getting blackouts where I just miss periods of time. Since most of the time I would have the blackouts was with my parents, they assured me that I didn't move, and no one knocked my unconscious, nothing of the sort. I sort of grew out of them until about a few weeks ago when they came back in 4th period, Psychology class. That was no fun, mainly because Psych is a fuckin' awesome class. But I lost the entire period from my mind, and when I "woke up", I was in the restroom stall, and I had burn marks on my wrist. It was probably just someone playing a prank on me. I'm not really the most popular kid in the school, and it would make sense for some douchebag to say "Hey, look that faggot's asleep, let's tie him up, and throw him in the bathroom." *Shrugs* No big deal.

I don't like getting them, and they usually make me nauseous when I "wake up" from one. Just *shudder* ergh. It makes me feel weird just talking about it. 

Anal Shipment- Cecil

Relationship Confirmed

Swaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag - Cecil

Well, Sorry 'bout that + Transcript of argument between me and Chris

I felt like giving an air of mystery around my blog for fun. That last post was just a little ARG I was in, along with a few other members of the Slender Nation forum. I found it quite fun. It ended anticlimactically, but I enjoyed myself nonetheless. 

On another note, yes. Eric is dead, and yes that is partially why I haven't updated. I was shocked, and horrified, but I soon moved on, and coped with the loss of Eric. The main issue is that Chris (Eric's brother) blames me for Eric's suicide, that it was somehow my fault. All I have to ask is... How the fuck is it my fault that Eric went and OD'd? I didn't give him the drugs, hell I didn't even know he was on Zoloft. He told me to not go to the funeral, with which I responded with "Fuck that."


More or less, here's a transcript of what happened, when Eric came to my house. I got it recorded, mainly because I was in the middle of doing a podcast.

Cecil: And so, yeah Watch Dogs has been delayed, and a ton of people, myself included, are extremely pissed off.

[Door knock]

Cecil: Excuse me a second my friends, I seem to have a visitor. A first for the Cecil Barnes podcast!

[Cecil approaches the door, and opens it.]

Cecil: Uh... Chris? Hey man, what's up? 

[Chris does not respond]

Cecil: I'm in the middle of doing a podcast, so if you could like let me step outside and-

[Chris pushes past Cecil , and walks into his house]

Cecil: Or, you could walk in, yeah that's fine too.

Chris: He's dead.

Cecil: [Nervous laugh] What? Who's dead?

Chris: Eric. Eric's fucking dead.

Cecil: What? Uh... you're joking right? 

Chris: [Yelling] Do I look like I'm fucking joking?! 

Cecil: [Deep breath] Wait, so Eric's dead? What the fuck happened?

Chris: [Still yelling] He overdosed on his medication! HE FUCKING KILLED HIMSELF.

Cecil: Oh my god

Chris: Yeah, and you know what? I know you had something to do with it.

Cecil: [Taken Aback] What?! What the fuck are you talking about?

Chris: You were the ONLY one to have talked with him! What did you say, huh? What did you tell him?

Cecil: What? No! I haven't talked with him. That's the deal! I haven't seen him, since like fucking today, at school!

Chris: BULLSHIT. I KNOW YOU HAVE FUCKING SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT

[Chris pulls out a switchblade and lunges at Cecil]

Cecil: DUDE WHAT THE FUCK?!

[There's a scuffle, and the clattering of metal against wood is heard.]

Cecil [growls] Get. Out. Of. My. House.

[Chris runs out of the door.]

Cecil: Fuck this.

[End podcast]

The Paragon Games

I have joined it, and there's no way out now. - C

Explanation

Anything that is remotely serious will be in red ink. Well, from now on.



I slit my wrist again.


I was doing so well.


I thought I was.


I hadn't had any urges for months. I haven't always been the "peppy, upbeat" guy you know. 

I used to have some pretty serious internal demons, and coupling my depression, anxiety and self-loathing with news I have just heard, it was obvious that I would do it again.


Eric is dead.




Eric is no more.


Eric is now cold, and lifeless.


Eric isn't coming back. 


To top all of that, Chris thinks I have something to do with it, like it was my fault that Eric went and fucking took an entire bottle of Zoloft. 


That was the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak.


I don't know if I'll be continuing this blog any more.

See ya - Cecilio

Relapse

Fuck I did it again. 

A Very Awkward Halloween; starring Cecilio and the Girl he likes.

      My Halloween, by any standard other than my own, was very uneventful. I went to my crush's house to view "The Wicker Man" and then we dicked around her neighborhood. It would seem that I didn't have a nice time, but I did. I enjoyed being around her. I enjoyed listening to her laugh, and I loved talking to her. I felt super nervous, and so I spoke in a very hushed, dry tone, not really my speed.

      I ended up bumping into her a lot, which caused me to apologize a lot. She said it was cute, but I felt really paranoid, as I did not wanna fuck this up. This was my first relationship with a female in a while, and it seemed my social anxiety decided to take a nice piggyback while I went over. 


      We're probably going to hang out tomorrow, and hopefully I won't be all paranoid, and maybe I'll ask her out. That's being hopeful. Urgh, high school romance makes me feel weird. Like depressed, but hopeful. 


      Eric was at school today, but only for a short period of time. He more or less looked like really sickly and shit. He was there for about thirty minutes, and he went to all his classes to get work. I am worried about that kid. Not as worried as my love life, but still very worried. 

Enjoy Kiddies- Cecilio